review: Grafix Block Tech Superheroes

We interrupt our regularly scheduled review to bring you a special news report. Our roving reporter, Staci Stickleblock, is downtown to bring you the story. Are you there, Staci?

special-report-1Staci: Thanks, Brick! Chaos erupted just minutes ago when rogue paleontologist Rex Tyrannis, better known as “Wreck-It Rex,” broke loose from his handlers!

special-report-2Staci:  Citizens are running for cover as Rex and reanimated museum dinosaurs rampage through the city streets! It’s mayhem out here! Utter mayhem!

Hang on, Brick! It looks like Rex is preparing to make a statement…

special-report-3

Rex: Attention, citizens! I will severely scratch the paint on this European luxury sports car unless I receive all the sausages in an hour’s time! All of them!

special-report-4Owner: Mamma Mia! Not my Porrarighini Carrestarosstach!

special-report-5Staci: A bizarre demand from a desperate, hungry, criminal! I’m now joined by the Chief of Police. Chief, what is the Police response going to be to Wreck-It Rex?

Chief: It’s not our policy to give in to the demands of criminals. At the same time, apprehending a criminal like Tyrannis presents a challenge to law enforcement. The city’s annual budget was already stretched pretty thin, and well…

Staci:  Are you saying the Police are unable to afford to subdue Rex and the other dinosaurs? What about calling “Earth’s Mightiest Heroes?”

Chief: We’ve sent out a call for them, but they generally don’t respond to threats of damage to personal property. But I want to assure the public that the Police do have a “Plan B” prepared for events such as these.

bt-sh-boxChief: They’re not the heroes we need, but they’re the heroes we’ve got.


Following a tip from a poster on the Bloks Forum, I found this set of five minifigures in my local Target’s bargain area. It should be pretty obvious that they’re modeled after the Avengers. Let’s have a closer look at them out of the packaging. Avengers Superheroes Assemble!

revenge-fig

Hawkeye! Black Widow! Revenge!

smasher-figThe Hulk! Smasher!

falconman-figCaptain America! Falconman!

metalman-fig

Iron Man! Metalman!

lightning-bolt-fig

Thor! Lightning Bolt!

bt-minifigs-compared
Lifeguard: Hey, Babe. Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven?
Revenge: I could kill you five times before you even hit the ground.

It should be pretty clear that the superhero minifigures utilize a body design that’s slightly different from the standard Block Tech minifigure. In addition to being taller, the torso is longer and shapelier. The legs are also more rounded. The hands have defined fingers, but they are unable to hold accessories. The heads remain unchanged.

falconman-fig-2
It’s really difficult to tell from this photograph, but there’s supposed to be a falcon emblem on Falconman’s chest. The problem is that it’s printed in black, making it almost impossible to pick up on camera.

Rather than getting hair or a helmet, Falconman and Metalman receive round 1×1 plates to plug the hole on top of their heads.

xxl-vs-xxsOne of the drawbacks to the new torsos is that it makes certain figures (Smasher and Lightning Bolt in particular) appear as though they’re wearing low-rise pants. That, plus their muscular physiques, makes them look more like they boogied straight out of a Magic Mike movie.

tis-a-living
Olivia: Woo, shake that moneymaker!
Lightning Bolt: (Sigh.) ‘Tis a living…
smashed
“UNCLE!”
futility
Revenge: C’mon, put up your dukes! Put ’em up!
Falconman: Let’s all calm down. Perhaps my new bird friend and I may offer a bipartite solution…

Conclusion

For USD$3, you receive five minifigures – which seems like a pretty good deal. However, the fact that the hands can’t really hold anything is a pretty glaring flaw (not that Block Tech thought of including accessories). Also, the faces just look plain ugly. I can sort of understand why Falconman and Metalman have white eyes, but why would the other characters have white eyes? Are they blind or something? It wouldn’t be so bad if the figures looked a little more like their digital renderings on the packaging.

I wonder if this is the last we’ve seen of Block Tech at Target, or if these minifigure sets are only the advance party of a larger invasion…


As for Wreck-It Rex, a collection was taken, and a package of hot dogs was bought for Rex. Rex and the dinosaurs left town once the hot dogs were consumed, apparently forgetting their threat to scratch the sports car. Smasher is comatose in intensive care. Revenge and Falconman are missing and presumed eaten. Lightning Bolt earned $100. Metalman was found passed out in an alleyway and later haphazardly flew off when he was awoken by a child with a stick. Is this the last time we’ve seen the Block Tech superheroes? Yes.

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